The world needs more Lerts

There’s something heroic about this.

I have driven past this semi-aggressive notice hundreds of times on my way to work and I have to say that it never fails to raise my spirits. It’s almost perfect in its failure.

It may be the supreme confidence in which the ‘NO PAR’ section is executed, as if the signwriter (and I feel that he or she should be elevated to that status for this work alone) felt they were on an unbeatable roll. It was, at that stage, their version of the Hollywood sign. The world was at their feet.

Or perhaps the bold, huge letters were painted in pure anger, as if one person too many had parked inconsiderately in spaces adjacent to their retail premises. Damn them all, it wasn’t going to happen again! This was painted rage.

I have also imagined the pure horror and blind panic that went through the artist’s mind when they realised that they were running out of space, literally running out of wall.

But in the long run, I feel that this small creation stands as testimony to man’s determination in the face of daunting odds and sheer ridicule. The fact is, they pressed on with the rest of the word, the ‘kin’ bit. But even then, tougher times were ahead – just look at that G. It’s barely recognisable as such.

One interpretation of the sign could be that it is a visual metaphor for human life – we start off bold and fearless, then doubt and fear creep in as we attain adulthood. Finally, towards the end, our life is often extinguished with a whimper and the realisation that we are insignificant in the wider context of human history.

Welcome to my world. Next up, a semiotic exploration of the hidden politics and sexual subtext that surround the formation in which people put their binbags out on the pavement the night before collection.

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